bottombitch | IC Contact @ Riverview

_{[ Nope. Karamatsu doesn't care. HE'S NASTY. Not when he thinks everyone is looking at him but he can easily ignore something like that when he's being intimate apparently.
He freezes when Aoba touches his hair, lingering Aoba in his mouth so he can't exactly speak. It's like going to the dentist and they start talking to you with their hands in your mouth, yeaaah. He just listens to the words and comprehends what's going on with a slight grunt noise.

He pulls back, though, until his lips are curved tightly around the tip. He pumps Aoba's shaft with his hand like he would his own, tracing the flat of his tongue over his partner's slit and around, swirling over the very end several times. His other hand steadies himself on Aoba's hip as he does this, pausing only briefly to take Aoba in whole again. He slides back again and completely this time, turning his head to grimace and regain his composure. Unlike Aoba, it doesn't look like he enjoys this that much, but that doesn't stop him from continuing, craning his head to the side to suck along him from tip to base and then swallow him halfway again.

He keeps it up fervently, finding rhythm by bobbing back and forth and giving pressure to the base half of Aoba's prick with his hand. ]}

[ Aoba instinctively brings a hand to his face, struggling to silence the sharp intake of air when Karamatsu's grunt brings a deep and altogether too brief vibration singing along his length. It's light and short, but it excites his nerve endings so that when he draws his head back to follow Aoba's instructions, Aoba stammers out in surprise at his own sensitivity. ]

W-wait. Ka...ra... ah!

[ Even in the privacy of his own house, in this cramped closet of a changing room, he tries to keep his voice down and failure only heightens his shame. He completely forgets about it when he feels a slick, soft feeling teasing at the tip, the point of his tongue teasing at the slit in a way that makes Aoba's cock twitch as he cries out.

He's really trying, Aoba thinks, and while he doesn't really know what he's doing, he seems to have learned from watching and taking cues from him. That's... incredible, but what's more amazing is the fact that he seems to be doggedly going through the paces, not finding joy in it but trying his best nevertheless. Aoba feels his breathing become shallow and labored as he tries to keep up.

The pressure and stimulation aren't consistent, but it still feels really good. Plus, it's the fact this is Karamatsu doing it, and watching him is... is...

...Kind of painful. He looks like he's not enjoying this one bit. While there's a part of Aoba deep down inside who might relish in watching a man have to do something he doesn't want to, wants to make him struggle through something unpleasant... that's not how Aoba feels. He brushes his hair and presses his hand against his forehead to stop his head from bobbing as he breathes harshly. ]

L-let's stop here...! It's okay.

[ Aoba can't take watching him work this hard to please him, not when he looks like he doesn't like it. ]

_{[ It's his first, so the whole taste and texture is a little off-putting, but the reward of hearing Aoba pine for him makes it worthwhile. He's angry that he's made it so obvious that he isn't enjoying this as much as one might have hoped for; now that emotion begins to show on his face, a pent up aggression that he tries to earnestly to hide all of the time. He groans, grumbling against Aoba when he stops the rhythm, freezing to cast his eyes upward and look at him as his brows draw together slightly indicating some annoyance. He removes his mouth entirely from Aoba and lifts both of his hands to Aoba's hand, pressing his fingertips into his palm.

He seems about as out of breath as Aoba is, also beginning to pant. ]}

I do not wish to stop! I want you to feel very good!
_{[ He kisses his fingers lazily, dragging his lips back down to take a hold of him and engulfing him halfway once more.
Persistent, isn't he? ]}

[ Aoba makes a startled sound, gasping at the rumble of sensation when Karamatsu growls in annoyance with his mouth full. He wasn't expecting that, but he sees that Karamatsu has a determined look on his face. He might not really enjoy doing this, but he wants to anyway. He thinks he's trying to prove a point, by taking his hand away -- gently, with a small reward of a kiss on his fingers that makes it that much harder to resist. It's also in stark contrast to how his hand would get knocked away or held down when his nerves got the better of him. He didn't mind that either but the way Karamatsu does it feels startlingly romantic. ]

You don't have to prove anything... we could always try somethi--hihh!

[ His offer is quickly cut short by the swiftness with which Karamatsu returns to the task. He's so persistent, it irritates Aoba for a moment, particularly because he caused him to make a weird sound, but all he seems able to do is touch his hand when it returns to his cock, watching him through a haze of embarrassment and lust. It's kind of incredible, seeing Karamatsu, who he initially suspected thought of his tastes as disgusting, would be on his knees eagerly and determinedly trying his hand at cocksucking. Aoba brushes his fingers through his hair and against his cheek, sometimes touching the wet space between his hand and mouth as he stimulates him.

Aoba's pulse is racing, that momentary annoyance forgotten as he picks up where he left off. He shifts his hips as that restlessness grows in him, that desire for release. Except he doesn't know if it's nerves or guilt but something is distracting him. ]

...Um, would you... rather have sex? [ Aoba, not everyone is able to just spring back like Noiz. Who's to say Karamatsu is even ready for that?! ]

_{[ Something about Aoba wanting to change ideas seems insulting to him more so than the fact that maybe Aoba is noticing he isn't quite as into this as he thought he would be. He doesn't bother to break off from Aoba to speak again, humming lowly as he picks up the pace with what he's doing. He can taste his partner's pre-cum but at this point nothing is going to prevent him from finishing what he's started, not even Aoba's suggestions. He adjusts his posture, sliding back and forth and sucking harshly at the very tip, casting Aoba a heavy looking glance. Man, it took him no time to orgasm; he's a little embarrassing about that since Aoba is lasting a longer time.

He slows his movements just slightly, scraping his nails lightly against Aoba's thighs and sitting up more straight. He grips his prick once more and gums down his shaft going far enough to tease his testicles with his tongue before coming back around and taking him in full like he did at first. ]}

Kara-kun...?

[ Aoba starts questioningly, he doesn't understand that look or the silence, except that it's a quiet refusal to cease or accept his offer. He doesn't think it's a rejection -- somehow, he doesn't think someone would reject the offer of sex in favor of sucking cock as an insult and Aoba quickly shuts his mouth. He wants to do this, even if he doesn't like it...

Is it because it's him? Or is he trying to prove something? Is he just trying to repay him? Like Noiz so often wanted to do? Aoba doesn't have much time to dwell on these questions, not when that slick, sweet stimulation causes him to pant lightly, struggling to catch his breath. ]

Nn! Ah... [ His hand is trembling a little when he runs it through his hair, unsteady because of the sensations of blunted nails scraping gently over his bare skin feels good, and the hard suck on his cock is of a sharp intensity that he can't take much of but appreciates for its roughness. ]

Careful -- [ Aoba gasps, his chest hitching between shallow, quick breaths. He's nearly at his limit, his nervousness might be keyed high due to Karamatsu's insistence, but likewise his excitement grows with it. He's being so dirty, not answering him at all except to insist on doing this to him. It's... pretty hot, actually. ] It'll be bad if I come while you're...

[ Aw, look at Aoba, getting all concerned about Karamatsu getting come in his mouth. But this is his first time doing it, so sometimes it can be a bit of a shock and... unpleasant. He's reminded about how he dislikes the slimy feel of it but he also gets off on it. It's a general disgust he has that oddly arouses him... he thinks that makes him weird. ]

_{[ It's exhausting. Karamatsu can feel himself nearly suffocating from not getting enough air on top of beginning to get riled up again himself. Yeah, no. He doesn't spring back up just like Noiz does, but the familiar heat from his face is spreading to his ears and down his neck; he feels his knees pull in together slightly.
After a moment of this, he can't do it much longer and Aoba has a point: he doesn't think he can swallow Aoba's release if he tried. Despite his vigor, he chickens out. He pulls back and gasps for air, properly flushed and completely worn out looking as he gives Aoba a glance upward. For somebody who uses such colorful words, he's oddly silent through this other than all the slurps and gulps he's been making. He remains there for a moment, swallowing the mix of saliva and Aoba's pre-cum before easing to his feet and meeting Aoba by pressing their bodies together, burrowing into his neck. He uses his hand for the rest of the way, grabbing Aoba by the cock and beginning to pump him hard and fast. He knows how to use his hand a lot better, slipping his shaft between his index and middle finger for a few pumps and then bringing the pad of his finger over his slit, rubbing in tight, firm circles. ]}

[ When Karamatsu pulls back and gasps for air, Aoba reaches for him and pulls him into his arms, embracing him. Tipping his chin up, he looks dazed over Karamatsu's shoulder as he starts to jerk him off. It's a totally different sensation, it's rougher and purposeful. He's... actually a lot better with his hands than he is, Aoba notes for a moment before his breathing goes wild.

This is it, I'm going to -- and with Karamatsu...!

He knew that they were beyond just friends or soulmates long before this, at least he was in his heart and mind. Maybe it didn't seem that real yet, but now it's impossible to deny. Karamatsu, who has no experience with a guy -- or with anyone, really -- tried like hell to make him feel good. He can feel his exhaustion in the way he breathes and holds him. He wants him to know how grateful he is he tried, and besides... he wants to feel him close, closer... as near to him as he can when he gets all the more desperate to come. His muscles tense up, clinging to Karamatsu as he moans close to his ear. He's right there, and the rush of Karamatsu's hand pumping over his cock is driving him crazy. ]

Hh -- ugh, ah, ahhh...!

[ Reduced to sharp vowel sounds, words fail him as he feels himself tip over the edge. His cock stiffening harder just before the first hot spurt of come gushes out around the finger rubbing the slit. He comes hard enough to make his hips stutter briefly, fucking his fist and crying out hoarsely against his shoulder as he tries to stifle the sound and fails. Coming down off his intense orgasm, Aoba relaxes in increments against him, his breathing slowing. ]

...Nngh. Haah...

_{[ Oh my god, holy shit, he did it. Karamatsu doesn't really know what to do with his hand filled with his release and other parts of his body carrying splatters of it across his skin. He doesn't know how to properly respond to being the cause of somebody's seemingly intense orgasm but all he can think of is that sounded really awesome and he'd love to do that again to Aoba. He settles for wrapping his arms tightly around Aoba and doing his best to keep him on his feet, locking his knees and keeping them both steady; he hadn't expected Aoba to respond to strongly to what he was doing but he certainly isn't complaining. He figures his partner needs a moment to compose himself so he just serves as somebody to lean on and somebody Aoba can embrace.

He falls silent trying to catch his own breath from getting into it himself. ]}

A-ah! You feel nice, don't you? I'm.. very glad I could do that for you! It makes me happy to see you enjoying yourself..
_{[ HE'S TOO VIRGIN TO DO ANYTHING SEXY LIKE SAY SOMETHING SMOOTH OR LICK HIS CUM OFF HIS FINGERS so he just caresses him with his hand that is less sticky. ]}

[ Surprise! Someone actually likes you, Karamatsu! It's not even limited to tolerating his touch but Aoba actually likes kissing and touching him. Usually. Aoba hardly has time to enjoy the afterglow, sagging against Karamatsu after his body just released all that tension he didn't know he was hanging onto. It's been a while, particularly since in the last few years he's grown used to a certain level of 'activity', and to make it even more frustrating, he's been crushing hard on his soulmate for months.

But the moment Karamatsu goes and calls attention to the embarrassing sounds and faces he surely made while in the heat of the moment, Aoba's face instantly heats up again and his instinct to deny everything. Which he can't really do for obvious reasons, but that won't stop him from flustering. ]

O-of course, I mean, it's only because I was so riled up!

[ Aoba settles a little at the caress, reluctantly looking into Karamatsu's face. Wow. He really went overboard with his joke, teasing Karamatsu until one thing lead to another and they ended up like this. He feels good and doesn't really regret it, but he feels a slight pang of guilt that he was Karamatsu's first. Plus, that look on Karamatsu's face is killing him, he's going to die of embarrassment. ]

...Sorry, I kind of got it everywhere. [ And to Karamatsu's credit, he isn't making a big deal of it either. Doesn't it feel gross? ]

T-That is quite alright, Aoba-kun! These things happen. Hah, I should know.. sometimes I make quite a mess when I am by myself. This kind of sticky feeling; I do not mind it but I also do not care for it. Whenever you are ready, we can wash up, but I will wait for you.. however long it takes.

_{[ Relax as much as you like, he's just going to keep holding Aoba, occasionally giving him gentle and light kisses on his face. His voice hushes but is full of honesty: ]}

I'm here for you.

[ He's being considerate...

Aoba looks at him for a moment, blinking as he kisses his face and holds him. He doesn't seem disgusted at all, he looks pleased and that makes him feel a little less tense. He had worried that he would get grossed out by what they did, but he doesn't really get that impression at all. Aoba inwardly feels himself relax. ]

...

[ Aoba turns his cheek to kiss him full on the lips when another kiss comes, hugging him. ] You taste a little different. [ And then he thinks, of course he does before his face reddens and he covers his mouth in another kiss. He feels strangely lighter after letting himself go a little wild with Karamatsu, like he was able to come to terms to something he's been burdened with for quite some time. Still, he frets and worries just a bit, wondering if it was okay. ]

...Hey, Kara-kun. [ He wants to ask if he hated it. But no, that's not the kind of question he should ask. It might make him defensive and answer in such a way as to spare his feelings. ]

Lets wash up and relax in the bath a while.

_{[ He wouldn't ever be grossed out. He's been waiting his whole life to be like this with somebody; he can ignore anything that's 'gross' but he's one of those people that finds it beautiful, you know. Karamatsu tries his best to find poetry in literally everything so the fact he's reacting like this shouldn't surprise anyone.
He takes the kisses happily, humming in delight every time he is smooched. Aoba should take note of how overjoyed he seems right now; it's nothing he's ever seen before. ]}

As you wish!
_{[ He breaks off and kiss and simply helps himself heading to the actual bathroom now and starting the bath for them. ]}

[ Aoba feels that anxious pressure on his chest lessen when he hears him hum happily. Something about Karamatsu seems so different, like there's an innocent or childlike wonder about him. Light and carefree. Aoba knows what that feels like but it's... odd.

Odd when it's during a situation like this, where someone's genuinely happy. He thought maybe he was the only one who felt this way, in fits and starts until the world closed in around him with it's judgmental assumptions and every other burden that society imposed on him and people like him. Aoba pulls away from the kiss with a lazy smile on his face, and tracks him with his eyes as Karamatsu enters the bath... only for that awareness to close in on him, chasing away the smile. ]

...He seems so happy. [ Surely it's not because of him. Is it? Aoba hangs there, in this small enclosure that serves as a sort of self imposed purgatory. He wonders if he should feel bad about this. That he's gone this far even before the first date. Or maybe... it's not really the first date, not really. Not when he's been loving him for so long.

Aoba balls his fists and slides open the door after Karamatsu, whispering back through the opening. ]

I'm... I'm coming in!

_{[ Of course he's happy. He has no reason to be sad. He just had a wonderful and intimate time with the person he's fairly certain he's madly in love with, so it shouldn't matter how messy it is or how clumsy he can be with all of this. They both felt good in the end so Karamatsu can't complain; he's also got nobody else to compare against Aoba and he has enough fake confidence to not feel intimidated by any other competition he may have for Aoba's affection. He'll take any bone that Aoba throws to him out of sheer desperation.

He's already crawled into the tub as its filling up with warm water and has gone straight to rinsing off his skin when Aoba comes inside the bathroom. The smile on his face simply hasn't died down in the least. ]}

I-I hope you didn't mind I went on ahead, I was eager to feel clean.
_{[ A beat. He spreads his arms out to Aoba, pausing his bathing for just a moment. ]}

Please, come on in!

[ Aoba sees he's already in the tub and wonders just how long he's been spacing out. It's not the first time, it certainly won't be for the last, so he quickly steps under the shower to start washing himself off. He pumps shampoo into the palm of his hand and starts to carefully massage it into this sensitive hair. ]

I don't blame you... [ Aoba huffs a laugh, too embarrassed to express that he was looking forward to scrubbing his back. Or... washing his hair. GOD. THAT'S SAPPY EVEN FOR HIM. Aoba turns his reddening face into the spray of water to try to cool or or at least distract himself with the rush of water. After he rinses his hair out, he starts washing off his body. He glances up while he's lathering himself down and quickly turns away, embarrassed at the sight of him welcoming him with open arms. ]

D-don't rush me, there was a lot of... stuff. You know... [ Don't make him explain why he's being thorough about cleaning. Except he's spending a lot more time blushing than he is washing, and eventually he runs out of real estate to scrub down and rinse so...

In he goes. Making sure he's pinned up his hair so none of it hits the water and not so much as a bubble of soap remains on his skin. The hot water envelops him and he sighs when he slips into it. ]

_{[ Karamatsu visibly melts in the tub, slinking against it as he watches Aoba clean himself, admiring him. It's so obvious how stricken he is and he doesn't care to hie it. He gives Aoba some space once he steps in, but then he's right next to him right after, sliding his arm gingerly around his shoulders. His other hand takes Aoba by the chin to make him look at him. In a soft tone: ]}

When was the last time somebody told you how wonderful you are?

Eh?

[ As much as he tries to focus on cleaning, he can't help but feel his eyes on him. Even after they did all of that, he still feels self-conscious, perhaps a bit more because they had. Aoba makes a small sound when his chin is lifted, causing him to drift a bit closer to Karamatsu until he can feel his shoulder sticking against his in the water. ]

...I guess, n-not in a while, if... you mean outside of the last time you said it?

[ Because, actually, he has no one in his life to give those kinds of embarrassing affirmations. It actually makes him a little conflicted -- sad and embarrassed at the same time. Koujaku would sometimes say these really earnest things, but nothing like that. Clear would say 'master this' or 'master that' or maybe 'master is wonderful' but that was not the same thing. Noiz he... wasn't the best with his words, more likely to be direct and blunt than to dish out compliments. Granny was more likely to throw chopsticks at him than say he was wonderful.

He feels oddly vulnerable, and some of that is probably because they're in the bath together, but he's been feeling like that a lot. Aoba resists the urge to withdraw in on himself by drawing his knees up and puts his arms around them... and instead reaches out and slips an arm around Karamatsu's waist and holds him instead. ]

I feel like somehow I don't really deserve that compliment.

You are more than just wonderful.
_{[ Sure, Karamatsu is really desperate and really needy, but his feelings and sentiment are true and valid when it comes to Aoba. He's never had someone outside of his family give him so much happiness. He couldn't exactly place his finger on it if somebody asked, but he knew that without him, he felt lifeless.
He runs his knuckles along his friend's cheek for a moment before he steadies his palm on his face. ]}

You are.. the sunshine in my blue skies! Ah, the song birds in my empty trees. Simply said, you are what brings me joy when I am feeling sad.
_{[ Easy there, bud. Fascinatingly enough, Karamatsu says this without a bat of a lash and without any embarrassment. He's even looking into Aoba's eyes when saying so. ]}

...Karamatsu, are you --

[ In love with me is what he wants to ask, but he thinks he'll hear the same answer. He probably thinks he is, and to a degree he thinks he returns those feelings. Knows he does. But it's complicated. Aoba doesn't trust himself completely and wonders if he's maybe just a little bit in love with the idea of being with someone. ]

Are you sure? I mean... with... what we're doing. [ Aoba draws his knees to his chest and hugs them, resting the side of his face against his knees as he asks Karamatsu the obvious, but at the last minute Aoba buries his face in his arms and knees and mumbles through them: ]

...I don't really know what I'm asking.

_{[ Woah there, that's certainly a change of mood, and despite being somebody who can't read the atmosphere very well, he knows damn well something is off about this reaction.
He gives Aoba some space, but steadies his hand between his shoulder blades. He thinks he knows what he is asking, but.. ]}

Are you concerned you don't feel the same way or feel as strongly about me but.. perhaps you enjoy the pampering and attention I give you?
_{[ In a way, Karamatsu knows it's something he shouldn't be doing. He should also pull back on the reigns to prevent getting hurt or hurting Aoba, but.. he simply cannot resist when somebody is just even a minuscule interested in him. ]}

[ He's feeling a little vulnerable. It's the first time he's been intimate since Noiz, so there's a bit of emotional whiplash. But the moment Karamatsu speaks so bluntly to him, color returns to his face and he blinks back at him in alarm. ]

N-no! I like you! More than anyone else in quarantine! I just...

[ Don't trust myself. Aoba thinks, but decides even that would be unnecessary to say to someone. Who wants to hear that kind of uncertain, wishy-washy crap? Aoba lowers his knees and arms, he can feel his hand on his back so he reaches for Karamatsu's other hand to hold it under the water. ]

...I want to make sure I'm giving you the attention you deserve too. Not just... um, you know.

_{[ Karamatsu tips his head, but seems pleased with the validation. He doesn't think he's very deserving of any attention when it boils down to it, but Aoba is the only one who even gives him a small bit of attention so he's satisfied with that.

He takes his hand, lips curling upward in a smile. ]}

Of course you are! I have never gotten so much attention in my entire life.
_{[ He's being honest here?? ]}

IC Contact @ Riverview

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DIES AT THAT ICON look at that muppet

look at that dicc

Fdhsjkgd Kara so aggressive

he tries

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THAT ICON kara i'm proud of u son

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god dammit my computer restarted and I lost my tag SOB

rip

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